Dad Jokes: Valentines Edition

Dad Jokes: Valentines Edition
by Robb Schreiber

OPTIONS for Dad Jokes:

  • Dad Jokes are a fun thing for leaders to share from up front at the beginning of club as kids are coming to club.
  • Have a devoted 3 minute section of club in which all the leaders line up in front of club and they each have 2 or 3 dad jokes. Go down the line of leaders and have them tell 1 at a time. Go down the line 2-3 times
  • This could be a fun way to have a few kids come up front and tell some dad jokes along with some leaders.
  • Have Drum Sound Effect (Ba dum tss) and or have Crowd Laughing Sound effect queued up on sound system for each joke.
  • This list is probably too much for one club, choose your favorites.
  • Your own creative way to make this a win for your club.

Q. Did Adam and Eve ever have a date?
A. No, they had an apple!

Q. What did the flame say to his buddies after he fell in love?
A. “I found the perfect match!”

Q. Why shouldn’t you fall in love with a pastry chef?
A. He’ll dessert you.

Q: What do you call a very small valentine?
A: A valen-tiny!

Q. How did the phone propose to his girlfriend on Valentine’s Day?
A. He gave her a ring.

Q: What did the toast say to the butter on Valentine’s Day?
A: You’re my butter half!

Q: What did one muffin say to the other on Valentine’s Day?
A: You’re my stud-muffin!

Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive you!

Q: What did one watermelon say to the other on Valentine’s Day?
A: You’re one in a melon!

Q: What’s the perfect thing to say to a coffee-lover on Valentine’s Day?
A: “Words cannot espresso what you mean to me.”

Q: I gave my girlfriend a cannoli for Valentine’s Day.
A: When she asked why, I said, “I cannoli be happy when I’m with you.”

Q: Do you have a date for Valentine’s day?
A: Yes, February 14th.

Q: What did the rabbit say to his girlfriend on Valentine’s Day?
A: Somebunny loves you!

Q: What did the whale say to his girlfriend on Valentine’s Day?
A: Whale you be mine!

Q: What did the boy bear say to the girl bear on Valentine’s Day?
A: I love you beary much!

Q: What did the boy bee say to the girl bee on Valentine’s Day?
A: You are bee-utiful!

Q: What kind of flowers do you never give on Valentine’s Day?
A: Cauliflowers!

Q: What did the boy octopus say to the girl octopus?
A: Can I hold your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand?

Q. What did the boy cat say to the girl cat on Valentine’s Day?
A. You’re purrr-fect for me!

Q. What did the boy bird say to the girl bird on Valentine’s Day?
A. Your my Tweet heart!

Q: Why did the banana go out with the prune?
A: Because it couldn’t get a date.

Q: What did one volcano say to the other?
A: I lava you.

Q: What’s Cupid’s favorite superhero TV show?
A: Arrow.

Q: What’s the best part about Valentines Day?
A: The day after when all the chocolate goes on sale.

Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Luke
Luke who?
Luke who got a Valentine!

Q: What happened when the two angels got married?
A: They lived harpily ever after.

Q: What did the French chef give his wife for Valentine’s Day?
A: A hug and a quiche.

Q: What do you call two birds in love?
A: Tweethearts.

Q: What did the cucumber say to the pickle?
A: You mean a great dill to me.

Q: What did the tweenager give his mom?
A: Ughs and kisses!

Q: What did one light bulb say to the other light bulb on Valentine’s Day?
A: I wuv you watts and watts!

Q: What do you write in a slug’s Valentine’s Day card?
A: Be my Valen-slime!

Q: What did one bee say to the other?
A: I love bee-ing with you, honey!

Q: Why do skunks love Valentine’s Day?
A: They are very scent-imental creatures.

Q: What did the painter say to her sweetheart?
A: I love you with all my art.

Q: What did Robin Hood say to his girlfriend?
A: Sherwood like to be your valentine.

Q: Why would you want to marry a goalie?
A: Because they’re a real keeper!

Q: What did one barista say to their valentine?
A: I love you a latte

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